I received a message from an acquaintance last week, asking how we are doing settling into our new home. It doesn’t feel too new.
- We’ve been here over 2 years, which is the second longest we’ve lived anywhere, in the 22 years we’ve been married, topped only by our 3.5 year home in Minneapolis. (Though we planned to be here much longer.)
- It doesn’t feel like we’re settling anymore. Since my husband resigned from his job in January we’ve had one foot out the door. It’s been hanging out there so long, it’s starting to get cold and numb.
In light of that I didn’t respond immediately, but kept it in unread mode so I wouldn’t forget to respond in the busyness of 6 kids, laundry, dishes, and a traveling husband.
A week later, being today, the majority of the family was gone and the house was clean enough so I decided to respond to the message.
I won’t go into all the details, but as I was writing I started responding in this way:
God has provided well for us in the meantime and we are so grateful, but we are looking forward to more stability in our future
And I stopped…or something stopped me… or someone…
“Is that really what you want to write?”
Thinking… Well I guess it does seem kind of negative, maybe I should add hope to that sentence.
…We are hoping for more stability in our future
No…no…hmmm, well I guess I’ll just leave that part off.
God has provided well for us in the meantime and we are so grateful.
Yeah, that’s good. But why? It’s not only because it leaves it on a positive note, right?
I thought back to our family devotions this morning.
For you know the grace of our Lord Jesus Christ, that though he was rich, yet for your sake he became poor, so that you by his poverty might become rich. 2 Corinthians 8:9
We read this blog post Certainty Amongst Uncertainty.
It made me think about my security. I am secure in Him. I am stable in Him. I am stable in Him right here and right now.
I don’t need my husband to have a full time job, to know that God is going to take care of our family.
I don’t need to know the answer of what, when, how is going to happen to our foster children, to know that God is taking care of them now and the next day and the next.
I don’t need to know every specificity of my sons future leg surgeries and outcomes, to know that God loves this boy, created him and will care for him better than I ever could.
I don’t need to know how long I’ll live in this house, this town, this state, to know that God is keeping me right where he needs me at this right time.
How much more stable can I be than to know that God is holding all these things in his hands?
We don’t know if there will be any work in November, we don’t know the judge’s ruling or future decision dates for our little kiddos, or how many more surgeries my son will need, BUT God has NEVER failed us and how much better for us to be clinging to him as we move through life than running ahead thinking were safe with the things of this world.